happy days are never made to last....any sense of normalcy now is just da calm before storm...

fucking assault on my soul...
fucking irony full of woe...
fucking let me do as i please...
before all life's meanin starts to cease..

i shouldn't be wishing or hoping for any other things right now...lest it all backfires..i cant have anything backfire right now..not right now...not when it's already within my grasp...

strange..

Show encrypted text

sigh..

guess what...i cant sleep again..i've been thinking of lotsa stuff lately...well more than usual anyway...and it just hit me that im really self absorbed...as in not in a narcissistic way but...i keep thinking that im da only one who thinks like that and noone could possibly understand me....i've thought like that for a long long time...and it has caused me to shun a lot of people...i've come to discover that there are other weirdos out there too...haha...perhaps different kinds of weirdos..but weirdos nonetheless...okay i should use da term eccentric people...i guess one of da key factors that caused these people to elude me is because....i act normal and carefree most of da time...be whoever i wanna be whenever situations arise....da social butterfly...da antisocial punk...da emo....da bimbo....da gamer...da rocker...da 5 year old kid....whatever.....but it's real simple actually....who i really am....im a dreamer...haha...

again and again...

ugh..this is so bloody annoying..i cant sleep again...must be 2010 jitters...

何でまだここにいるんだ。。アタシの人生どんな方へ行くんだよ。。音楽やれば別に幸せになる訳ないでしょう。。最近、本物の夢が考えてるばっかり。。音楽よりの夢。。最終は音楽をすれば何か合える気がする。。その為にずっとずっと長い間音楽をして、もっともっと音楽に好きになったですが、オリジナル夢どんどん忘れてしまった。忘れてないかもしれないんだが、もう考えたくない。有り得ないんだ。。アタシの夢幻。。妄想してるばっかり。情けない。だけど、まだまだあきらめない。あきらめたら、今死ねばいいじゃん。活きる理由もないし。。死ぬまで信じていく。

YEAR 2010

~明けましておめでとうございます~
v(>m<)v

２０１０年も始まりまして、一番のポストが日本語でやりします！あまり時間がないから、日本にいる友達には連絡がしませんでした。シンガポールにいる友達にも、もし連絡しなかったら、ここで言います！このポスト読めば、ごめんと「Happy New Year」！

New Year's Eveは、ナイトサファリに行きました！超楽しかった。昔一緒にアルバイトをした人たくさん出会った。懐かしかった～その後は、Countdown Partyに行って、Supperを食べたり、友達と話したり、ゲームも遊んだ。朝っぱら６時ぐらいやっと帰ってしまった。

２００９年は本当の事言えば、最低だった。男に騙されて、一人の友達が失って、夢もまだ適ってなくて、まだ私がここにいる存在の理由は見つけられないんだ。それなのに、闇の中で光が少しずつ 現れた。新バンドと仲間ができて、私のように非現実的な生物が大好きな人も友達になった！君らのお蔭で２００９年は最後にはよくなりました。

me, jon, weyman LOL

princess alamin from dubai LOL

 

da terrorist, da pontianak, and da hostage jovanchi LOL

ありがとうございます！今年も宜しくお願いします～

....and to end of na'vi style...LOL...

Mipa zìsìt lefpom ngaru! Eywa ngahu.

me and mini me

mini me's in town! woohoo..it's her first time in singapore and da house has been a whole lot rowdier..she's one rude and noisy girl lol..but it's this part of her that makes her so adorable..luckily she's cute that's why people are more forgiving towards her LOLOL that's da ironic truth man...with all my christmas prep i didnt spend as much time as i liked with her but we went to da zoo! again..wheee LOL went shopping too..she has da most horrid taste in clothes..LOL she likes to wear all da auntie style and chinese new year kind of clothes..omg la. but she's easily swayed..we just have to show her something else nicer and she would agree immediately HAHA so fun to shop for kids clothes...they have such pretty dresses..and we kinda wore 'matching' dresses to da zoo LOLOL..my aunt suggested it!

lolol did i mention she's damn chor lor too? and we both sit da same way LOL

lololol

emu and her haha

hahaha at some point i was helping her to take pictures of da giraffe...and she was alone with shio....shio came back and said i dont wanna walk with her already so embarrassing! cos right...some guy behind them burped damn loudly...and she shouted EEEEEEE who burp so loud so disgusting LOLOLOLOL fucking funny hahahaha okay that's all for now ja ne!

post christmas greetins...

christmas was great! laughed shitloads and luckily da food turned out great! first time trying out da recipes...pheww!

my absolutely gorgeous tree which i think looks like it was bought from a store already decorated...LOL..spent a long time decorating it...adding ornaments little by little everyday...

in da darkk...

i made da bow!

 

 

 

karu's soooooooo cute!

 

my newly painted and decorated door...

look at all da mistletoe...LOL

next up...FOOODDD!

yellow ang moh styled rice with tomatoes and mushrooms...YUM YUM

chinese styled asparagus because i screwed up da creamy sauce...lol...

roast chicken!

 finger food! fish and chicken nuggets...cocktail cheese sausages wrapped in ham...

squirrel shaped butter cakes...blueberry muffins and cheese tarts....there were christmas tree shaped konyaku jelly too...but shio forgot to take pictures of that...bahhhh...

moose shaped cake...da leg crumbled thanks to jovan...lolol...

another one with a crumbled leg...lol...

we had porcupine...bear..wolf...and other shaped cakes too!

our shape cutters...lolol...

charades time....jovan's attempt at aladdin...haha..

jon's version of prostitute...HAHA this picture cracks me up

LOL i dont know wth tawan was charading as...AHAHA

ko..me....bh had to leave so earlyyy....

everyone including glitz and karu! sans bh....

candid version!

reindeer version...LOL

im sooooooooooo tired...my cousin and aunt were also in town...but that's another story to tell later....mm...a short nap would do good about right now...lolol...

wow it's christmas eve! 

yay! it's been a real tiring few days...trying to finish painting my house in time (it's not done though lol)...spring cleaning..shifting furniture here and there...i had about 5 hours of sleep before i had to wake up and get today started...mfucking tired..hahaha...brought karu to clean his ears and glitz to cut her nails....walked all da way to festival market just to check how much da roast chicken was...but they're only selling it with da christmas combo so walked for nothing..zzz...headed to sing song to buy shitloads of stuff...shio and i had to stop like every few minutes just to rest our arms..it was that heavy...bathed glitz and karu...prepared some of da food...painted somemore...shifted furniture again...and now it's 2.55am....and i have to wake up in 3 hours to follow my parents to da wet market...and then more food prep....oh boy...i am complaining..i am bitching..but my tree's real pretty...and i'll get to spend christmas with all my friends...so i cant wait till da prep's all over and da celebrating begins...nights and...

Merry Christmas!