i just had to quote this.

I shall suppose … that some malicious demon of the utmost power and cunning has employed all his energies in order to deceive me. I shall think that the sky, the air, the earth, colours, shapes, sounds and all external things are merely the delusions of dreams which he has devised to ensnare my judgement.

—René Descartes

Death on Whore Street

Just a little something i wrote from a while back...lols..

M18 thank you very much! and noo..it's not porny -_-''

Portray a place in Singapore in a creative way, using themes such as fantasy, imagination and magic realism.

Death on Whore Street

She walked alone, decrepit eyes caught everything but nothing made sense to her. Strangers embraced her and bid her good day. Their names she remembered, empty words and nothing more. Just like those names, her heart, they resembled, cold, numb, a lifeless shell. She knew the way home, did she? Did she really know? And was that what it's called? Home, a word that did not belong. Home, a place, so real yet not. She lived a nightmare she could not awaken to. She was lost, in a place so familiar, that she had not belong.

Dazed and confused she staggered, passing neon lights and flashy signs. Filthy humans with desire filled eyes, all wanting her presence only to be forsaken. She walked, she stumbled, and she ran, desperate to get away from it all. Lost in despair, her body collapsed, never noticing the dark eyes that watched her.

Her bleeding heart faltered, missing a beat when she sensed him. For a moment, she thought the bleary lights were playing tricks on her eyes. It was then that she heard him, the sound of his faint footsteps approaching her slowly, his shallow breaths music to her ears. And as he got closer, she held her own with anticipation.

And then, with the sudden flicker of lights, she saw his glorious face, with the drafty winds in his obsidian hair, relishing in the moonlight. It was as if heaven had descended on earth. He's so perfect, so ethereal.

"I've finally found you," an alluring voice spoke.

And a beautiful smile graced his usually harsh demeanor.

'Oh gods, am I dreaming?' She thought.

She didn't want this to be a dream. Crystalline tears streamed down her face as she struggled to believe.

"Hush now, don't cry," he whispered while caressing her face.

His warm touch sent delightful shivers through her and she cast her teary eyes upon him. The moment she did so, she was so overwhelmed. His crimson eyes were filled with such intensity. They gazed upon her so passionately, lovingly, and longingly. An array of emotions flickered through his eyes at that moment, awing her, as she marveled under their scrutiny. Her tainted hands reached for his face hesitantly, brushing her fingertips on his pale, delicate skin. He then, graced her with a heart-warming smile.

'Oh, how long have I waited for this? For you to finally appear before me, for you to finally save me from my misery.' She pondered.

She embraced him so tightly, fearing that he would leave her, not daring to trust that this was real.

'Please, let this be real. Please, don't let this be a dream.' She prayed.

As if sensing her thoughts, he tilted her head up to meet his.

"You are not dreaming."

With that, he captured her lips in a searing kiss. Her soul, her mind, her body exploded from the intensity. Her spirits soared for she had found true happiness in escape. She kissed him back with equal fervor, so hungrily and eagerly, never wanting the moment to ever end.

After what seemed like an eternity, their lips parted, breaths shallow and cheeks flushed. Reluctantly, she opened her eyes that have clenched tight in apprehension. And to her horror, his body was dissipating. Her heart ceased to beat for the second time that night as she panicked helplessly. Her hands made futile attempts to grab whatever parts of him she could, only to grasp air. She cast disbelieving eyes on him, only to see a wicked smile on the remnants of his disappearing face.

'This can't be true. My mind's playing a cruel joke on me.'

"TAKE ME WITH YOU!" She screamed.

"Don't worry my love, I'll be expecting you shortly."

And just like that, he vanished. His whispered promises drowned by the echoes of her cries.

She screamed and cried till her throat was dry, and till her eyes became sore.

“Why…”

On the verge of surrendering to hopelessness, she hears the beginnings of a sorrowful melody, and it catches her in a relentless grip. Its music burns her skin and rips her soul, leaving behind sadistic comfort and nothingness. She starts to laugh with unabashed glee, as she welcomes the resonance of Death's melody.

Now, she lies alone in a sleazy alleyway, drenched from head to toe. The heavens were crying scarlet rain. For once again, another was lost to Death's warm embrace.

The End

Can you guess where this place in Singapore is?

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Geylang

lols did anyone get it? it's not a tragic love story ya know....da guy with obsidian hair and crimson eyes is a personification of death. and everything that happened is a figment of da whore's imagination because of her immense desire to escape. da entire kissing scene was just to emphasize the allure and temptation of death. fineee..maybe it was kinda porny lols...as for what really happened i'll leave it up to your own imagination..lols.

p.s Please do not copy my work! 

it's my fuckin' nightmare.

i know i haven't been blogging. i have shitloads i want to say...but it's all a huge garbled mess. i dont even wanna begin.

nothin' except a great rock song for me to angst to. i miss rock. jazz oldies pop classic...gimme a fuckin break. im not in such a mood right now.

avenged sevenfold's nightmare..strikes straight through da heart man.

Nightmare!

(Now your nightmare comes to life)

Dragged you down below down to the devil’s show,
To be his guest forever,
Peace of mind is less than never
Hate to twist your mind, but God ain’t on your side
An old acquaintance severed,
Render of your last endeavor

Ashes burning, you can smell it in the air,
Cause men like you have such an easy soul to steal.
So stand in line while banging numbers in your head,
You’re now a slave until the end of time
And nothing stops the madness turning,
haunting, yearning, pull the trigger!

You should have known
The price of evil,
And it hurts to know that you belong here, yeah
Ooooh, it’s your f-ckin’ nightmare
While your nightmare comes to life

Can’t wake up in sweat, cause it ain’t over yet,
Still dancing with your demons,
Victim of your own creation beyond the will to fight,
Where all that’s wrong is right
where hate don’t need a reason
Love is self-assassination

You’ve been lied to just to rape you of your sight,
And now they have the nerve to tell you how to feel.
So sedated as they medicate your brain
And while ya slowly go insane the tell you
Give in with your best intentions
Help ya with your complications

You should have known the price of evil
And it hurts to know that you belong here, yeah
No one to call, everybody to fear
Your tragic fate is looking so clear, yeah.
Ooooo it’s your f-ckin’ nightmare ha ha ha ha!!

(ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha)
Fight, fight, not to fail, fail
Not to fall, fall
Or you’ll end up like the others.
Die, die, die again, die
Drenched in sin, sin
With no respect for another
Oh!

Death, You!
Feel the fire, fire
Feel the hate, hate
Your pain is what we desire.
Lost, lost, hit the wall, wall
Watch you crawl, crawl
Such a replaceable liar.

And I know you hear their voices
(calling from above),
And I know they may seem real
(these signals of love),
But a life’s made up of choices
(some without appeal),

They took for granted your soul
And it’s ours now to steal
As your nightmare comes to life

You should have known the price of evil
And it hurts to know that you belong here, yeah.
No one to call, everybody to fear,
Your tragic fate is looking so clear, yeah
ooooh it’s your f-ckin’ nightmare!

whaddaya want from me

Happily ever after, 

Through yonder dreams She wanders,

Mortal sins She no longer lusts for,

Never matter, not now, not ever.

There she lays in a bed of roses and mourning,

Hear the silent forests weeping,

White as snow, cold as snow,

On a lonely winter's morning.

Piercing through our quiet lament,

The evil witches cackle with glee;

"She's dead..She's dead!

Now all shall proclaim me Queen!" One screams.

And like a bolt out of the blue,

Lightning strikes with a sword so true...

Happily ever after,

Through yonder dreams She wanders,

Neither true love's kiss nor vengeance sweet She desired.

For through yonder dreams She wanders,

Happily ever after.

da format's a little warped this time..but i kinda like da way it turned out. my insomnia's back again. im sooo tired but i had a good day..took da time to catch up with some friends..met up with jovan edi and ko. jovan and i went hunting around for this shamscam adoption thingy. supposedly claims that one of da puppy mills were being abandoned and they needed people to adopt their pups...turned out to be a prank. we later met up with edi and spent time with julius till dinner. haha met up with ko after too...long long tiring but good day. really miss spending time with everyone. i guess im gonna try to sleep now. gutto naito lol

i heart lol

Flight of Dragons

Flight of dragons soar in the purple light

In the sky or in my mind
Flight of dragons sail past reality
Leave illusion behind

Is it the past I see
When I look up to the heavens
Believing in the magic
That I know could never be

I want to go where they are going
Into the world they've been
Can I open up my mind enough to see

Flight of dragons, heavenly argosies
Catch the wind, rise out of sight
Flight of dragons, pilots of fantasy
In the sky or in my mind

Flight of dragons
Flight of dragons

wow i love this song...haha

RAWRRRR!

FINALLY MY LONG AWAITED OFF DAYYYYYYYYY

still gonna have a busy weekend though. sigh..i kinda miss doing and thinking nothing.

i lie awake and think of nothing...

i went to school but i learned nothing...

i go to work and still do nothing...

now i fall asleep with dreams of nothing...

but because of nothing...

i fall asleep dreaming of something...

i go to work and must do something...

i went to school and learned some things...

but i still lie awake and think of nothing...

so while i lie awake and think of nothing...

i hope my dreams would be full of something...

and work or school would be nothing but fun things...

so everyday would be everything but nothing...

lol just something random..

animal faces

im gonna imagine animal faces everytime i sing. lol...it feels really good..when i sing to glitz or karu...and i sing with much more sincerity. i was singing while walking home today..it was da middle of da night so it was real quiet...was singing rainbow connection...haha it was so peaceful..wind blowing..leaves rustling....was strolling even swinging my hands and all...just me in my little fairy world....and all of a sudden a guy walks past me. LOLOL so embarrassing! oh wells...

The Rainbow Connection

Why are there so many songs about rainbows
and what's on the other side?
Rainbows are visions, but only illusions,
and rainbows have nothing to hide.
So we've been told and some choose to believe it.
I know they're wrong, wait and see.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.

Who said that every wish would be heard
and answered when wished on the morning star?
Somebody thought of that and someone believed it.
Look what it's done so far.
What's so amazing that keeps us star gazing
and what do we think we might see?
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.

All of us under its spell. We know that it's probably magic.

Have you been half asleep and have you heard voices?
I've heard them calling my name.
Is this the sweet sound that called the young sailors.
The voice might be one and the same.
I've heard it too many times to ignore it.
It's something that I'm supposed to be.
Someday we'll find it, the rainbow connection.
The lovers, the dreamers and me.  

someday..we'll find it..the rainbow connection...da lovers..da dreamers and meeee....

悪魔と約束

i just found something totally fascinating and had to blog about it! 

the devil's covenant...an everlasting contract with mephistopheles..one of the seven princes of hell...

"I'll be your comrade true,
Here to your service i will bind me.
Beck when you will,
I will not pause or rest.
But in return when yonder you will find me.
Then likewise shall you be at my behest."

and da mortal faust replies...

"The yonder is to me a trifling matter.

'Tis from this earth my pleasure springs,

And this sun shines upon my suffering;

If to the moment I shall ever say:

'Ah, linger on, thou art so fair!'

Then may you fetters on me lay,

Then will I perish, then and there!"

it's exactly like what they say when people supposedly sell their souls to get whatever they want in this life...but in da afterlife their souls would forever be bound to da devil...

okay dont ask me what im doing at 5 am in da morning..i dont know either hahaha

(p.s. happy lunar new year and valentine's day lol)

hi grandpa

my granddad's in singapore...he's gonna be here for a week. he's da only one in my family who actually likes music..he used to play da accordion..when asked what i was doing..my mom gave da embarrassed look and said im singing and playing piano. very throw face meh bitch. i still feel like shit. and my looks match too. lol. horrible outbreak...dark circles puffy eyes. all in all i look like da living dead. im really living (lol no pun intended) up to my new nickname 'Ponti'...aka pontianak. sigh im so cranky and moody..and my family's really not making it better. it's really so hurting..that out of everyone they are da ones who mock my dreams da most.

haha oh you know what's funny? hahaha i've got a mask on now...FACIAL mask LOLOL haha omg im retarded.

jon jovan annee............i dont mind if you call me ponti...i miss hanging out with you guys...i keep spamming our forest lullaby video la...haha.....stupid fatty in sydney.....(ToT)

it's a song i wrote for jon...dedicated to him and all his friends...i'll be recording a better version next time...but for now...lol....

The Forest Lullaby

lalala laa x 6

A midsummer's dream was how we met it seem
A bright starlit sky with dragons flying high
A twinkling melody of crickets in harmony
While all the fairies swoon under the sleeping moon

lalala laa x 3

It's like we were caught in a spell
Or a wish from a magic well
Did we sprinkle pixie dust?
To make this moment last..

Fall asleep to the forest lullaby
In this dream there will never be goodbyes
Hearts entwined we will meet again someday
Once upon a land far far away

lalala laa x 3

A rainbow fantasy where unicorns came to be
Where magical creatures play hide and seek all day
While gnomes speak in rhyme bells of laughter chime
Then we all sing along to the little sparrow's song

lalala laa x 3

It's like we were caught in a spell
Or a wish from a magic well
Did we sprinkle pixie dust?
To make this moment last..

Fall asleep to the forest lullaby
In this dream there will never be goodbyes
Hearts entwined we will meet again someday
Once upon a land far far away

Fall asleep to the forest lullaby
In this dream there will never be goodbyes
Hearts entwined we will meet again someday
Once upon a land far far away

lalala laa x 3

(ToT)

Scarlet skies behold a bitter moon

Heaven's fury's bound to come soon

Whilst you reap tears of the weeping willow

Milky twilight trail I must seek and follow

In wistful blue dreams I drown and wallow

Oh pray tell..how..what..I should do so

Where..Oh where is the green faerie's moon?

Where is the cow who jumped over the moon?

Wont you lead me afar to the faerie moon..

Wont you take me away to the faerie moon...

sent jon off today...practice didnt go well...guess was kinda emo and moody....and when i came back...i read one piece manga....omg....made me even more sad....major spoiler...im just gonna say a main chara died....i have to go for training early tomorrow...i really dont feel like it...=(

oh i had strange dreams again...lol...besides fatty...lol...i dreamed that i found a dead animal under my void deck....it was some squirrel skunk? im not sure...then i was like damn i have to bury another animal?...but while i was nudging it...it woke up..and transformed into some other unknown animal..it looked like an evil black fawn...and it kept jumping around following me..wanting to be pat...kinda cute..it had razor sharp teeth though...and even though it looked really fluffy..its fluff was hard as armor....hahaha...oh and i was at da ocean and a bunch of water dragons rose outta water...fucking awesome....lol...there was lightning in da background and everything..so dramatic...lol...somehow we needed da dragons' help for what i forgot....and da dragons had to come on land....but they didnt walk or slither...lol...they swam in the air...they're da wingless species...hahaha and i got to ride one..so fun!...alright..mata yume no jikan dayo...byeebyee

bury da castle..

Brick By Boring Brick Lyrics

She lives in a fairy tale
Somewhere too far for us to find
Forgotten the taste and smell
Of the world that she's left behind
It's all about the exposure the lens I told her
The angles were all wrong now
She's ripping wings off of butterflies
 

keep your feet on the ground
when your head's in the clouds
 

Well go get your shovel
And we'll dig a deep hole
To bury the castle, bury the castle
Well go get your shovel
And we'll dig a deep hole
To bury the castle; bury the castle
Ba da ba ba da ba ba ha

So one day he found her crying
Coiled up on the dirty ground
Her prince finally came to save her
And the rest you can figure out
But it was a trick
And the clock struck 12
Well make sure to build your house brick by boring brick

or the wolves gonna blow it down
 

keep your feet on the ground
when your head's in the clouds
 

Well go get your shovel
And we'll dig a deep hole
To bury the castle, bury the castle
 

Well you built up a world of magic
Because your real life is tragic
Yeah you built up a world of magic
 

If it's not real
You can't hold it in your hand
You can't feel it with your heart
And I won't believe it
But if it's true
You can see it with your eyes
Or even in the dark
And that's where I want to be, yeah
 

Go get your shovel
We'll dig a deep hole
To bury the castle, bury the castle
ba da ba ba da da ba da......
ba da ba ba da ba ba da..... 

absolutely love love loveeeee this song...da mtv is mad awesome...lol...im never gonna bury da castle though...im gonna build it brick by boring brick!

a dream is a wish your heart makes..

A dream is a wish your heart makes
When you're fast asleep
In dreams you lose your heartaches
Whatever you wish for, you keep
Have faith in your dreams and someday
Your rainbow will come smiling thru
No matter how your heart is grieving
If you keep on believing
the dream that you wish will come true

lol

Take me to fairy moon..

if i blew hundreds of birthday candles..
if i wished upon a thousand shooting stars..
if i prayed for decades and decades..
if i clicked Dorothy's slick red heels..
if i rubbed Aladdin's precious lamp..
if i stole merlin's magical wand..
if i had tinkerbell's fairy dust..
if i sold my soul to vile Lucifer..
if i listed a million if i's...
will my dreams finally come true...

jaded fighter's bound to lose

I can sense it, an assault on my soul
Blasted through the ages, ancient evil made whole

I can feel it, a battles begun
A fight through the ages, that's never been won

I can hear it, calling to me
The shouts through the ages, finally set free

I can see it, a shimmer in time
Flung through the ages, now clear as a chime

I can smell it, a taint of the air
Wafted through the ages, like moldering fare

I can taste it, tormenting my tongue
Diffused through the ages, like putrefied dung

And so it began, and so it will end
The war of all ages, and all must attend

p.s ive created a new label called FERU'S BOOK..it's a compilation of writings that i wrote and like...poetry proses...lyrics...yea...don't copy yea...

feria tempesta

hestuare feria matituepesta
hetare whispari estepare
he e e e yea o fashoheos feshiti

hestuare feria matituepesta
hetare whispari estepare
he e e e yea o fashoheos feshiti

hesho kiayea maestifa
keche kiayea dispares
hesho kiayea maestifa
keche kiayea dispares

te te tedicoshe matitespa
ta ta ta chelare curano
ta ta diero matitespa
te te te diero fiespo

hesho kiayea maestifa
keche kiayea dispares
hesho kiayea maestifa
keche kiayea dispares

te te tedicoshe matitespa
ta ta ta chelare curano
ta ta diero matitespa
te te te diero fiespo

ta dicoshe matitespa
fiefa chelaro cagaro
mate diera matitespa
te te te diero fe espe

te te tedicoshe matitespa
fiefa chelare curano
ta ta diero matitespa
te te te diero fiespo

hestuare feria matituepesta
hetare whispari estepare
he e e e yea o fashoheos feshiti
amen

fuckkkk

dear lil' black bunny...oh so tempting..
what great lengths must i journey...
thousand five hundred and counting..
a tit or a tat..this or a that...
till you are in my arms lil' cutie...
another prose i shall be writing..
dear lil' black bunny...oh so tempting...

dear ol' woodpecker...oh so annoying...
what long hours must you linger..
won't you cease your endless knocking..
a bam and a wham..boom then a pow
you aggravating lil' fucker
there's a prose i should be writing
dear ol' woodpecker...oh so annoying...

海～

Unwavering agony, begone, flee,
Flee as thou summons thee.
Disillusioned memories, forsaken soul,
Come back to me, redeem me.
Fantasies, desire love,
Break me from this sanity.
Welcomed nightmares, holding dreams,
Free me from reality,
Save me from reality.

Unfulfilled vengence, innocent masks,
Damn the mortal enshrouded in bloodlust.
Praying, hoping, lost in sin,
Drowning in a dream to be.
Prisoned, abyss of darkness,
Release me from thy relentless clutches.
Cursing, hiding, fearing fuck knows what,
Crucify thy shattered heart,
Crucify thy broken heart.

Cry,
Sweet damnation has comed.
Weep,
Foolish humanity's been judged.
Mourn,
Hellish wars consumed peace.
All,
For the unforgiven sin of one.
The punishment has begun.

Free me, kill me,
Save me from reality.

edited version...dont know if my usage of old english is correct....just came back from east coast...been a while....kinda nostalgic...had a fun popiah picnic...lol.....lots of stuff running through my mind right now....bahh...

暗くて、堪らない

just some crap i spewed out yesterday...a little different from how i usually write but whatever....

Coldy trapping, an endless darkness
Silently passing, time is ceaseless
Brightly shining, blindly waning
My glorious sun is breaking

Desperately seizing, I am mindless
Wretchedly aching, it is hopeless
Tightly holding, clearly losing
Your fickle rays arent reaching

Softly piercing, a familiar loneliness
Gently shrouding, comfort in nothingness
Secretly beckoning, really warming
The numbing cold is dissipating

Ever searching, I am soulless
Ever hurting, I am heartless
Hiding, crying, facades are shattering
Hoping, believing, in nothing I trust in

haha wow this is extremely obvious....まあ～いいか。

boy am i up earrly!

im having a fucking headache right now...wheeee! topsy turvy days bakkari...どうしてだろう。。分かんないんだよ！心が痛くて、堪らない。。誰か説明してくれない？今の状況がだい嫌い。お前ってさ、他人の話を聞かないでくれない？自分の心が何を言ってるんだ？始めには、私に大丈夫って言ったんだが、他人の話聞いて、もう大丈夫じゃなくなったんじゃん！何だよそりゃ！最初からもう問題いっぱい。お前と一緒にいる時、なんかもっと寂しくなりそう。お前の明るさは私の所へ届けないんだよ。みんなに愛されたのお前は、私の事何か分かる。話しても、分からない。分かっても、何にもできない。好きなタイプじゃないし、楽器を弾けないし、バカバカし。。。そう言っても、私が光を少しでも掴みたい。だから、ポリマン。。ごめん。やっぱりお前の事本当に好きになれるみたいだが、長い間を闇に溺死されるの私は、光に引かれててしまった。それなのに、お前を苦しませたくないんだよ。。。



haha look i what i found! a trucker cap that says 山獄! omg!! lolol epic cap of all time man!



my new panda cap..lol



my old panda cap..LOL..gosh i just saw da previous one and had to buy it..hahaha



da best buds nua-ing together...LOL



naughty karu hiding on da table...hahaha..



look at what happened to my room light last night..amazing..lol..



luckily it didnt hit glitz and karu..

I've got a gun in my hand but that gun won't cock
My finger's on the trigger but that trigger seems locked
and I can't stop staring at the tick tock clock
and even if I could I would never give up.
With a vest on my chest, a bullet in my lung
I can't believe I'm dying with my song unsung.
And if and when I die won't you bury me alone?
'Cause I'll never get to heaven if I'm singing this song.

If there was something wrong would you be oh so strong?
Would you do what it takes to move this hollow life along?
I'd like to think I would, you know I'd like to think I would
but I can guarantee that what you see is not reality
and every time she makes a point, I make a counterpoint
She said it's easy but in the end you'll have no choice
and you know that's only just the way it goes
You said it right man, That is just the way it goes

And the days, and the days they seem like forever
And the days, and the days they seem like forever
But forever isn't ever enough!!
I'd like to sing a song
Promise you won't be long!
I'll try not to be long but I don't want to get this story wrong
There was a kid who never cared about the little things
Don't even bother because I'm tired and I'm sick of it
And every time she makes a point, I'll make a counterpoint!
She said It's easy but in the end you'll have no choice
And you know that's only just the way it goes
You said it right man, that is just the way it goes

I've got a gun in my hand but that gun won't cock
And my finger's on the trigger but that trigger seems locked
and I can't stop staring at the tick tock clock
and even if I could I would never give up.
With a vest on my chest, a bullet in my lung
I can't believe I'm dying with my song unsung.
And if and when I die won't you bury me alone?
'Cause I'll never get to heaven if I'm singing this song.

Oh, You don't know where I've been!
Oh, You don't know what I've seen!

If I did something right
Would you give up this fight?
Would you say you were wrong and maybe someone else was kind of right
I'd like to think you would
You know I'd like to think you would
but I can't guarantee that what you get is an apology
Jump back to the day we met
I never thought that it would end this way
If ever I let you down I want to ask of you
To take it down a notch and we can talk it on through

And the days, and the days they seem like forever
And the days, and the days they seem like forever
But forever isn't ever enough!!
I'd like to sing a song
Promise you won't be long!
I'll try not to be long but I don't want to get this story wrong
There was a kid who never cared about the little things
Don't bother 'cause I still don't give a shit
And every time she makes a point, I'll make a counterpoint!
She said it's easy but in the end you'll have no choice
And you know that's only just the way it goes
You said it right man, that is just the way it goes

I've got a gun in my hand but that gun won't cock
And my finger's on the trigger but that trigger seems locked
and I can't stop staring at the tick tock clock
and even if I could I would never give up.
With a vest on my chest, a bullet in my lung
I can't believe I'm dying with my song unsung.
And if and when I die won't you bury me alone?
'Cause I'll never get to heaven if I'm singing this song.

Oh, You don't know where I've been!
Oh, You don't know what I've seen!

So tell me friend, how's it going to end?
When the shit goes down and there's no one left around to get your back
You'll crack
You'll smile and agree with everything they say
They'll try to tell you that it's all okay
But it's not and you're shot and you're bleeding pretty bad
And you can't stop thinking about the things you never had
Like a wife and a kid and the things you never did
You're running around
You're living a life that's empty in the end, my friend

No, You'll take back all you've said
Oh, When the regrets fill your head

Trust me I've been there before
I would not wish it upon my greatest enemy
What irony!
Once friends, but I find
You'll have to learn this lesson on your own

So I waited by the phone but that phone never rang
and I sang so loud so I wouldn't hear the bang
When the bang never came and I never got the call
Fuck It! Thank You! I Love You All!
Some are going to say that we're doomed to repeat
all our past mistakes
Great!
But that's not me
and even if it was I would always disagree
Because in the end I always get the better of me

I've got a gun in my hand but that gun won't cock
And my finger's on the trigger but that trigger seems locked
and I can't stop staring at the tick tock clock
and even if I could I would never give up.
With a vest on my chest, a bullet in my lung
I can't believe I'm dying with my song unsung.
And if and when I die won't you bury me alone?
'Cause I'll never get to heaven if I'm singing this song.

Oh, I'll take you where I've been!
Oh, I'll show you what I've seen!

amazing lyrics..counterpoint by streetlight manifesto..

wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf wtf WTF WTF WTF WTF WTFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

In Memory of a Dear Friend

Dedicated to the Granddad I never had..



A Song for the Lost

Words caressed me like a winter's breeze
The deafening silence coldly pierces me
Of every sweet breath I longed to hear
Never was it of your sudden departure

Unsaid farewells you left behind
Promised meetings we never did try
That last phone call would never suffice
Now all's too late to say our goodbyes

I pray I pray you can hear me say
Your smiles your laughter I would surely miss
For only you my unfeeling heart secretly weeps
You were stronger than this
You were never meant to leave
God's a thief who stole you from me
Why why before I could say sorry
Why couldn't I have said goodbye

As days go by and grievance dies
Don't cry don't cry I've not forgotten
This lonely december I'd always remember
Goodbye goodbye my dear friend and father

Love always,
FIERA



dear uncle eng kiat..thanks for teaching me all there is to japanese station...thanks for all da fun and laughter we had at night safari...thanks for these past three years...thanks for buying me that hello kitty bag i never did appreciate...thanks for making me your goddaughter...thanks for talking crap with me and making fun of me...thanks for always insisting in having me stationed at jap station with you...thanks for everything...

sorry i couldnt do anything when you got fired...sorry that your last memory in night safari was so fucked up...sorry i only called you once in while...sorry i didnt have lunch with you....sorry i couldnt have lunch with you...sorry i didnt know how hard you had it going...sorry i didnt say goodbye....

i swear i'll come back stronger than ever...i swear i'll become someone you'll be proud of....i swear i would definitely achieve my dreams....when i do...let's have lunch together...